Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I just ordered $70 worth of pizza and I'm not even ashamed. Happy Valentine's Day to me.
Randomize