Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
Don't be hating on my everclear. Never taken a smoother journey into intoxication.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
