They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
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