My nipple is on Facebook.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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