how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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