I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
