I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
