I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
