Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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