She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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