You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I'm talking to a corgi on tinder..wtf has my life come to
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
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