Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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