like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
