My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize