how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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