i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
We are two peas in an std pod
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Randomize
