It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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