So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
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