id be glad to
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
