i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
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