6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
Say something about gay babies.
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
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