i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Randomize
