i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
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