If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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