sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
just cockblocked my boss's 17 year old son at the Christmas party
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
Randomize