2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I had not one but two drunk coworkers text me and hit on me tonight. I feel like I've finally been accepted into my dysfunctional workplace
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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