Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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