Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I came so hard my ears popped.