I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Well my sober pact lasted almost an hour. Then I did four shots. But in other news, one of those shots I took with a midget. So like I couldn't turn that shit down.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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