I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize
