no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
Randomize
