you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I didn't shave. On purpose
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize
