I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Randomize