let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
she made my bed before she left. i think i'm gonna keep banging her to get the housework done
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I took a yellow and pink pill, all of a sudden my sex drive is back, and for some reason all I wanna do is fuck Amish dudes
Good God, I miss doing unknown drugs with you.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
