Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
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