So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
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