do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
Randomize
