You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I FOUND THE LEGS
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
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