Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
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