Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
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