You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Semen is not good for contacts.
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
