Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
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