I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Randomize
