meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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