This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
so I think he was half asleep, but he woke me up by saying "where's my cow? Is it being shipped?" He must have been dreaming about farmville..
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Randomize
