Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
