White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
