I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
Randomize
