I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
