i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i think i have herpe
just one?
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
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Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
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I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
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