One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
It took me three days, but I managed to nearly get arrested on my way out of LA. Made it to the airport. Crisis averted, though. The real crime is, my flight is delayed two hours.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize